Making the rounds today is the story that Daryush Valizadeh, leader of a group of manly-men called Return of Kings, has cancelled a gathering of rape-legalization advocates after not being able to find sufficient secure meeting areas. Ironic, right? Actually, no.
The article that many are reporting as the promotion of rape legalization was just a satirical absurdity, and Valizadeh himself has stated repeatedly that it is just a thought experiment and not meant to be taken seriously. But, naturally, the kind of person who doesn’t fact-check took it as real and continuously makes clickbait headlines like This Colossal Douche Thinks Rape Should Be Legalized instead, seemingly preferring the kick they get from being angry or making others angry.
Normally, if there is a satire site, you can find somewhere on the site that states that the article(s) is/are satire, and nobody reports on those as if they were true. However, the people who are continuously fooled into thinking The Onion is real are laughed out of the park because they don’t bother to check. I’m at a loss to explain how so many people simply refuse to make the same acknowledgement of the same kind of disclaimer on the site they claim is pro-rape:
Q: “Why do you want to legalize rape?”
I don’t. Legalizing rape is a notion so insanely absurd I never imagined that people would take it 100% seriously, including politicians. I don’t believe any form of physical violence against men or women should be legalized. I’ve said that “How To Stop Rape” was a satirical thought experiment so many times that it’s clear to me current misinterpretation of it by the media is deliberate.
The Real Irony
The real irony, is that the false reporters are essentially raping this guy’s message for what it is. They are ignoring his declarations of “no, it isn’t” and believing he means the reverse, and taking out abuse on him for something he never claimed to be true. The people who report that he advocates for legalizing rape, when he doesn’t, are basically saying, “we won’t take no for an answer,” and then paradoxically just doing as they please regardless of what he says.
Next perhaps they may also cry out that such-and-such is a namecaller, despite namecaller being a name the accused is called.
An additional irony could be that the false reporters could be actually in danger elevating the satirical article he wrote to classic literature status.
Famed literary writer Jonathan Swift, known to English teachers across the globe, wrote in his treasured hyperbole, “A Modest Proposal for Preventing the Children of Poor People From Being a Burden to Their Parents or Country, and for Making Them Beneficial to the Public” (usually shorted to A Modest Proposal), that children of the poor should be consumed as food in order to support wealthier people, so that those children are no longer a burden on the public good —
“A young healthy child well nursed, is, at a year old, a most delicious nourishing and wholesome food, whether stewed, roasted, baked, or boiled; and I make no doubt that it will equally serve in a fricassee, or a ragout.”
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